My father was aged 3 and his sister was 5 when they lost their mother. and in another four years lost their father also. So their growth story is not born out of love but out of sympathy of some of the neighbours till such time the sister was ready to take over the reins. Then sister got married ( marriage was conducted with the help of the people in agraharam and she was the second wife for her husband. But in one way she was lucky her husband showered his love till his deathbed.) Some how my dad grew up and got a government job near his village itself. my maternal grand father was interested in bhajans and spent his entire life on nama sankeerthanam without expecting any earnings. Till such time my uncle could get a job my grand ma has to depend on her mother for support. Thus my great grand ma entered into picture. My father was living in the opposite house of my great grand ma's sister and when she saw my dad she liked him and fixed him as the husband of my mom. The marriage was conducted simply ( totally only six people from my dad's side attended the marriage). Great grand ma chose a house for my parents and stayed with them to be their guide in the initial stages of life. I never saw my dad looking at my mom with loving eyes or heard any endearments uttered. But one thing is for sure. I also never saw them fight amongst them selves. We, brothers and sisters were brought up under strict control. Movies a strict no no. ( one of the co tenants with us was a health inspector in a municipality. so he will be given free passes in the movie theatres. one fine evening after much pursuation from him and his wife along with their entire family my parents relented and took us to a movie. The name of the movie is Senjulakshmi.) School uniforms will be purchased for deepavali. Nobody ever said love you to anybody in my house. The only way my mother know to express her love is by cooking to our taste and there will be plenty of it.

Time rolled. I got married. Went on honey moon to Kannambadi dam (Presently called K.R.Sagar, Mysore) Wanted to hold the hands of my wife which she flatly refused as people are around. My pleadings with her to look around and see for herself the couples holding hands, her immediately reply was " venkamketta manusharkal". When my first child was born and my wife at her parents house i wrote a letter enquiring about her health and baby though i used to visit them once a week, i became the butt of the joke in my in law's home for writing such a letter. There ended my saying I love you saga.

My sons got married. Two new girls came and converted our house into a home. Whenever, we purchased something for them they started telling us i love you appa love you amma. Dont know how to express what i am feeling. one thing is for sure i am at cloud 9.

My mother expired in 2007. My father is 90 now and his can't say he is at his full senses. but even when he is not in his senses, all he rambles was about my mother and nothing except her. Now i can understand how much deep the love is though it was not exhibited in front of us.

Now i have a question? Is is necessary to say i love you to show i love people. is not a gentle hand holding, pat on the shoulders, slight kiss on the forehead, or my usual way of kissing on the cheeks/ kalaichufying the hair enough? ‪#‎rskpolambals‬#